“Being able to make a sincere apology — one that says, “Yes, I get it; I screwed up. Your feelings make sense, and I’m taking this seriously” — is at the heart of being successful in leadership, parenting, and friendship, as well as our own integrity and self-worth. And the failure to apologize? Even a good relationship will suffer quietly — because we really feel it when someone won’t take responsibility for what they said or didn’t say.” ~ Harriet Lerner
Being able to admit wrongs and apologize is one of the keys to a successful long-term relationship. The inability to do so can lead to a myriad of issues, which could end the relationship. Not the least of which is your partner feeling like they’re being taken for granted. This ingredient should never be put into the relationship pot.
Both people need to feel heard and appreciated in order for the union to stand the test of time. Acknowledging wrong statements and actions and using two simple words, “I’m sorry” can go a long way in rectifying problems and drawing a couple closer together.
What Does It Mean To Apologize?
An act of expressing regret for something said or done that was clearly inappropriate. What is even more important is, it must come from the heart. Because a heartfelt apology comes with a sincere effort to never repeat the wrong statement of action.
A beautiful thing about relationships is that both people understand neither person is perfect, and that a sincere union comes with conflicts, the need for patience, jealousy, faith, tears, trust, love, and being able to say I’m sorry when it’s needed. In order to make and keep a relationship strong both people need to put their egos aside.
How Apologizing Can Bring Positive Results.
Sometimes saying I’m sorry is a means to true correction and a stronger connection in the relationship. Just the expression of regret will make the other person feel better and more appreciated.
Apologizing doesn’t always necessitate that one person was wrong and the other was right. Sometimes it’s just a means of resolving conflict by one person putting the value of their connection over their own ego.
In a loving and powerful relationship, it’s about ‘WE’ not just ‘ME.’ In other words, it’s two people against the problem, not against each other. Think about it this way, the longer you hold off on apologizing, the longer you stay angry, and you can get back to the business of finding peace with one another.
“It takes a great deal of character strength to apologize quickly out of one’s heart rather than out of pity. A person must possess himself and have a deep sense of security in fundamental principles and values in order to genuinely apologize.” ~ Stephen Covey
A great relationship has both joyful and sad periods. When this is the case, both people understand the importance of personal responsibility, which sometimes involves apologizing to one another. Love has conditions. Expressing care and concern, listening without judgment, communicating with good intentions, and giving without justification, just to name a few.
When there’s conflict, apologizing helps both people feel better, and forgiveness is definitely an expression of love. Sometimes apologizing can be difficult. But remember, it’s about saving something that’s precious, which is the relationship.
The Best Way To Apologize?
Do it as soon as possible. Remember! This life is short. You never know when it will end for you or the other person. Don’t place yourself in a situation of increased regret.
What I mean is, you regret the wrong statement or action, and you don’t have a chance to apologize because the person has transitioned to the next life.
It’s essential to accept responsibility for any hurt you’ve caused someone else, whether deliberate or unintentional. Accept complete responsibility for your actions without being defensive, making excuses, giving lengthy explanations, or blaming others.”
Concentrate on the hurt you caused rather than the reason behind it. Always apologize first, and then, if you’re asked, talk about your original views or intentions.
Apologies are about expressing your heartfelt remorse for the pain you’ve caused. Respect the other person’s pain instead of ignoring it. It is critical to fully listen to the person’s sorrow, absorb it, and sympathize with it. An apology out of compassion is essential.
Make sure you tell the other person you’re apologizing because you want to make things right. Let him or her know you want to get back to being peaceful and loving each other. Your offer to reconcile demonstrates respect and a strong willingness to accept responsibility for the repair.
“The best way to have the last word is to apologize.” ~ Joyce Meyer
Relationships come with challenges even when we love someone deeply. However, one of the biggest advantages of apologizing is that you don’t have to pretend that everything must be done or stated exactly! In some ways, you’ve already predicted that mistakes and disagreements will occur. Rather than being terrified, you are ready to face them.
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